For years I've made a living with words, and I've had a passion for them as long as I can remember.
And like many wordsmiths, I'm quick to express my opinion at the drop of a poorly-used word or phrase. It's like if you used a socket wrench as a hammer in front of a master mechanic. He will tell you what an idiot he thinks you are, and it's not even his socket wrench.
Words are special. words grouped in a certain way are also special. You can argue that they're just symbols, but then again so are things like a dollar bill, a property line, a flag, a religious icon. Wars have been fought over all of them, and a war could certainly break out if Barack Obama uses the wrong words to a foreign leader. Tell me if he can get away with saying to Iranian head Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, "your mama eats bacon."
But some words and phrases sound brilliant when first coined, and are recycled to the point where they lose all meaning. And the more situations where they're applied, the more any meaning is diluted.
Every year, Lake Superior State University releases a list of words and phrases that have reached that fate. The school's website calls this the "List of Words to Be Banished from the Queen's English for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness.
OK, they're nutted out over capital letters and hyphens (there's no promise that those in the academic world are literate, as any editor who's suffered through press releases from an educational institution will tell you), but they mean well. The list does bring up valid points, and there are some good choices there. Here's the list. Unattributed comments are my own, and attributed ones are from the website:
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Green - "If I see one more corporation declare itself 'green,' I'm going to start burning tires in my backyard." writes Ed Hardiman of Bristow, Va.
Carbon footprint, or carbon offsetting - Mike of Chicago says that when he hears the phrase 'carbon footprint,' "I envision microscopic impressions on the surface of the earth where an atom of carbon forgot to wear its shoes."
Maverick - I first heard this one applied to George Wallace in the 1968 election when he ran for president under a third party. It's a good word, but it is overused. Personal note: I've been called a maverick, even by those closest to me. Like the 100-year-old man said when he was named in a paternity suit, I'd be right proud to plead guilty.
First dude - "Skateboard English is not an appropriate way to refer to the spouse of a high-ranking public official." Paul Ruschmann, Canton, Mich.
Bailout - I guess your attitude depends on whether you're the getter or the giver of said bailout. Ben Green of State College, Penn. says this: "Use of emergency funds to remove toxic assets from banks' balance sheets is not a bailout. When your cousin calls you from jail in the middle of the night, he wants a bailout."
Wall Street/Main Street - Ugh. The recent presidential campaign got to where a speech wasn't official until this phrase was worked in there somehow. Whatever happened to "a chicken in every pot?"
-monkey, as in Internet and texting blues monkey - "Especially on the Internet, many people seem to think they can make any boring name sound more attractive just by adding the word 'monkey' to it. Do a search to find the latest. It is no longer funny." Rogier Landman, Somerville, Mass.
<3 - This isn't a word, but is an Internet symbol for love. And you should know how I feel about this kind of crap by now. Sorry, folks, I send text messages, but I use real words in them. If you love someone, just say so. Nothing wrong with that.
Icon, iconic - I used this one earlier in this column, but correctly. An icon is something to be venerated. A cross may be an icon, but Britney Spears sure isn't. Even though I'll get real combative if you besmirched the memories of John Wayne, Hank Williams, Dale Earnhardt, or John Coltrane, they don't qualify as icons either.
Game changer - Another sports term that made its way into the mainstream. Send it to the showers.
Staycation - This becomes a feelgood word. If you spent a week sitting on the front stoop in your underdrawers drinking beer, you used to be a lazy bum. Now it's staycation. Somehow it sounds better.
Desperate search - as in, I'm on a desperate search for some of that there bailout money. Does that mean anyone will listen? Or care?
Not so much - I've probably used this at least once, and if I did I probably should be hosswhipped. From David W. Downing of St. Paul, Minn: "Do I like concise writing? Yes. Do I like verbose clichés? Not so much."
Winner of five nominations - I see versions of this, and let's get something straight right now. Anyone who has cleared third grade without political influence can get nominated for anything. Now, if he actually wins something, then let's talk.
It's that time of year again - Is it? OK. Can I go back to sleep now?
----------
That done, here are more words and phrases that make my own list. Some are a little more dated than others, but that just means they've stood the test of time:
State of the art - An oldie, but it's held up well. It meant nothing back in the 1980s and means nothing now. There are a few other phrases from the same quarters:
Cutting edge - Again, like "new and improved," means nothing. I did like "bleeding edge" when I first heard it, but that's mostly because it's so fraught with mental imagery. That was then, and it is now ready for a good amputation.
__ is the new __ - I think I first heard this when someone said, "50 is the new 30." Or something. What with my own age I hope that statement is true, but it still had me scratching my head. Now you'll find this expression everywhere, including in the Lake Superior press release. Christy Loop of Woodbridge, Va. said 'leaving a carbon footprint' has become the new 'politically incorrect.' " Enough said.
Back in the day - I first heard this one in an old stoner movie, and I'm guilty of using it myself, even in this column. Time to leave this phrase back in the day. And if you're younger than say, 50, you probably have no business using that expression.
__-friendly - Computers are user-friendly. Good and consumer products are environmentally friendly. The more I hear or read this one, the less friendly I feel.
__gate - We had Watergate, which started this mess. Several other -gates since then. Every time there's a scandal, someone's got to stick a -gate at the end of it. Sarah Palin took some heat for "troopergate," her own political mini-scandal. Let's give this one the gate, shall we?
Hands-on experience - As opposed to ...? It's kind of like your favorite newspaperman writing about a brutal murder, to distinguish it from a gentle murder.
__holic - I've been called a workaholic, but the person saying it was living off a trust fund. Consider the source. You also have chocoholics, coffe-holics, and who knows what else. The great Associated Press editor Rene Cappon once commented on this linguistic travesty, too: "I need a drink."
Annual event - One of my old photographers knew how I felt about this one, so when he took a picture of something that happened once a year he'd tell me "it's an anal event." What's worse is when someone calls something the "first annual" whatever. Now, how presumptuous is that?
Enough already! Back to my Elements of Style ...
And like many wordsmiths, I'm quick to express my opinion at the drop of a poorly-used word or phrase. It's like if you used a socket wrench as a hammer in front of a master mechanic. He will tell you what an idiot he thinks you are, and it's not even his socket wrench.
Words are special. words grouped in a certain way are also special. You can argue that they're just symbols, but then again so are things like a dollar bill, a property line, a flag, a religious icon. Wars have been fought over all of them, and a war could certainly break out if Barack Obama uses the wrong words to a foreign leader. Tell me if he can get away with saying to Iranian head Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, "your mama eats bacon."
But some words and phrases sound brilliant when first coined, and are recycled to the point where they lose all meaning. And the more situations where they're applied, the more any meaning is diluted.
Every year, Lake Superior State University releases a list of words and phrases that have reached that fate. The school's website calls this the "List of Words to Be Banished from the Queen's English for Mis-use, Over-use and General Uselessness.
OK, they're nutted out over capital letters and hyphens (there's no promise that those in the academic world are literate, as any editor who's suffered through press releases from an educational institution will tell you), but they mean well. The list does bring up valid points, and there are some good choices there. Here's the list. Unattributed comments are my own, and attributed ones are from the website:
-----
Green - "If I see one more corporation declare itself 'green,' I'm going to start burning tires in my backyard." writes Ed Hardiman of Bristow, Va.
Carbon footprint, or carbon offsetting - Mike of Chicago says that when he hears the phrase 'carbon footprint,' "I envision microscopic impressions on the surface of the earth where an atom of carbon forgot to wear its shoes."
Maverick - I first heard this one applied to George Wallace in the 1968 election when he ran for president under a third party. It's a good word, but it is overused. Personal note: I've been called a maverick, even by those closest to me. Like the 100-year-old man said when he was named in a paternity suit, I'd be right proud to plead guilty.
First dude - "Skateboard English is not an appropriate way to refer to the spouse of a high-ranking public official." Paul Ruschmann, Canton, Mich.
Bailout - I guess your attitude depends on whether you're the getter or the giver of said bailout. Ben Green of State College, Penn. says this: "Use of emergency funds to remove toxic assets from banks' balance sheets is not a bailout. When your cousin calls you from jail in the middle of the night, he wants a bailout."
Wall Street/Main Street - Ugh. The recent presidential campaign got to where a speech wasn't official until this phrase was worked in there somehow. Whatever happened to "a chicken in every pot?"
-monkey, as in Internet and texting blues monkey - "Especially on the Internet, many people seem to think they can make any boring name sound more attractive just by adding the word 'monkey' to it. Do a search to find the latest. It is no longer funny." Rogier Landman, Somerville, Mass.
<3 - This isn't a word, but is an Internet symbol for love. And you should know how I feel about this kind of crap by now. Sorry, folks, I send text messages, but I use real words in them. If you love someone, just say so. Nothing wrong with that.
Icon, iconic - I used this one earlier in this column, but correctly. An icon is something to be venerated. A cross may be an icon, but Britney Spears sure isn't. Even though I'll get real combative if you besmirched the memories of John Wayne, Hank Williams, Dale Earnhardt, or John Coltrane, they don't qualify as icons either.
Game changer - Another sports term that made its way into the mainstream. Send it to the showers.
Staycation - This becomes a feelgood word. If you spent a week sitting on the front stoop in your underdrawers drinking beer, you used to be a lazy bum. Now it's staycation. Somehow it sounds better.
Desperate search - as in, I'm on a desperate search for some of that there bailout money. Does that mean anyone will listen? Or care?
Not so much - I've probably used this at least once, and if I did I probably should be hosswhipped. From David W. Downing of St. Paul, Minn: "Do I like concise writing? Yes. Do I like verbose clichés? Not so much."
Winner of five nominations - I see versions of this, and let's get something straight right now. Anyone who has cleared third grade without political influence can get nominated for anything. Now, if he actually wins something, then let's talk.
It's that time of year again - Is it? OK. Can I go back to sleep now?
----------
That done, here are more words and phrases that make my own list. Some are a little more dated than others, but that just means they've stood the test of time:
State of the art - An oldie, but it's held up well. It meant nothing back in the 1980s and means nothing now. There are a few other phrases from the same quarters:
Cutting edge - Again, like "new and improved," means nothing. I did like "bleeding edge" when I first heard it, but that's mostly because it's so fraught with mental imagery. That was then, and it is now ready for a good amputation.
__ is the new __ - I think I first heard this when someone said, "50 is the new 30." Or something. What with my own age I hope that statement is true, but it still had me scratching my head. Now you'll find this expression everywhere, including in the Lake Superior press release. Christy Loop of Woodbridge, Va. said 'leaving a carbon footprint' has become the new 'politically incorrect.' " Enough said.
Back in the day - I first heard this one in an old stoner movie, and I'm guilty of using it myself, even in this column. Time to leave this phrase back in the day. And if you're younger than say, 50, you probably have no business using that expression.
__-friendly - Computers are user-friendly. Good and consumer products are environmentally friendly. The more I hear or read this one, the less friendly I feel.
__gate - We had Watergate, which started this mess. Several other -gates since then. Every time there's a scandal, someone's got to stick a -gate at the end of it. Sarah Palin took some heat for "troopergate," her own political mini-scandal. Let's give this one the gate, shall we?
Hands-on experience - As opposed to ...? It's kind of like your favorite newspaperman writing about a brutal murder, to distinguish it from a gentle murder.
__holic - I've been called a workaholic, but the person saying it was living off a trust fund. Consider the source. You also have chocoholics, coffe-holics, and who knows what else. The great Associated Press editor Rene Cappon once commented on this linguistic travesty, too: "I need a drink."
Annual event - One of my old photographers knew how I felt about this one, so when he took a picture of something that happened once a year he'd tell me "it's an anal event." What's worse is when someone calls something the "first annual" whatever. Now, how presumptuous is that?
Enough already! Back to my Elements of Style ...
4 comments:
Great points. I keep waiting for my daughter to ask me what the heck Watergate had to do with water.
BTW, this editor feels the need to correct you: Lake Superior State University.
Good catch, folks! Will correct.
when i see <3.
i think less than three.
GeologyJoe, it would be less than three, unless there's a menage going on. Or something.
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